Christmas Movies: Our Bottom Ten
Rick Retro’s Rankings #7: Counting down #25 to #16 All-Time Best Christmas Movies (w/ Retro Reviews up to 2026-01-12)
Rick Retro’s Rankings #7: Counting down #25 to #16 All-Time Best Christmas Movies (feature length, w/ Retro Reviews up to 2026-01-12)
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After completing our 2025 Christmas Tour and finishing the 2025 Christmas Leftovers, I’ve now reviewed 25 feature-length Christmas movies. Since I watched and analyzed all 25 twice in two years, I’ve Retro-actively re-graded and re-ranked a few of them, after this season’s second viewing, mainly because I gave more weight to their alignment with Judeo-Christian values. But it isn’t just that. Some movies seem better each time you watch them, some stay the same, and some get worse. For the purposes of ranking them, each viewing helps.
Let’s face it. This is really our Bottom Ten. Once I’ve reviewed a couple of hundred Christmas movies, most of these probably won’t even make my top 100. But for now, with just 25 reviews under our Santa belt, everything I’ve reviewed makes the Top 25!
If you want to see how the Bottom 10 were graded and ranked after my 2024 Christmas Tour and 2024 Christmas Leftovers, look here.
I’m ranking the overall quality of movies that are widely regarded as Christmas movies, not how well these movies demonstrate holiday spirit or even fit a Christmas theme.
Reminder: The arrow after a grade indicates if it is in the top third (^), middle third (>), or lower third (v) of works that share the same letter grade. The icons for EQ (Entertainment Quality) grades are as follows👍Overall Entertainment Quality, 📖 Story, 👥 Characters,📽️ Visuals,🎼 Soundtrack. Alignment with Judeo-Christian values range from +4 ✝️❎4️⃣ down to -4 ✝️⛔4️⃣.
Also: This post looks much better in your browser than on the Substack app, because the images in the links are not included in the version of the post that the app will show you. Go to rickretro.com in your desktop or mobile browser for the better rendition of this post.
Counting down from #25 to #16:
#25 D ^
👍C- | 📖C- 👥C- 📽️C+ 🎼B
✝️⛔4️⃣
#24 D+>
👍C | 📖D+ 👥B 📽️B- 🎼B-
✝️⛔4️⃣
#23 C ^
👍B | 📖C+ 👥B- 📽️A+ 🎼B
✝️⛔4️⃣
#22 B ^
👍A- | 📖A- 👥A 📽️A- 🎼A-
✝️⛔3️⃣
#21 B ^
👍A- | 📖A- 👥A 📽️B 🎼A+
✝️⛔3️⃣
#20 B+v
👍B+ | 📖B+ 👥B 📽️A 🎼A
✝️⚠️0️⃣
#19 B+>
👍B+ | 📖B- 👥A- 📽️B+ 🎼B
✝️❎1️⃣
#18 B+^
👍B+ | 📖A 👥B+ 📽️B+ 🎼B+
✝️❎0️⃣
#17 A-v
👍B+ | 📖B 👥B+ 📽️A- 🎼A+
✝️❎2️⃣
#16 A ^
👍A- | 📖A 👥A- 📽️B 🎼A-
✝️❎4️⃣
Coming soon:
Counting down from #15 to #11
Counting down from #10 to #6
Counting down from #5 to #3
Counting down from #2 to #1
Meanwhile, feel free to debate these rankings or post your own as comments! I especially want to know which rankings you think I got wrong!
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